Melancholia
by skybluescramble
Summary: Three people, two choices, and one strong bond of friendship. Sometimes, human needs to fight and sacrifice for love. ONE-SHOT.


from **skybluescramble**:

hello.

this is my first attempt at making a Gundam SEED fanfic, so i hope it will turn out... um, not as messed up as i think. this is a one-shot story, with an open ending, but please read and leave me some reviews!

credit goes to **koichii** for proofreading.

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**DISCLAIMER**:

Mobile Suit Gundam SEED / 機動戦士ガンダムSEED

SUNRISE/BANDAI©2002, 2011

* * *

**Melancholia**

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COSMIC Era 78.

"I can't believe it!" Lacus exclaimed, turning onto her side to face the brunette lying beside her with pure disbelief in her eyes. She was still a bit sleepy several minutes ago, but the news she just heard completely woke her up. "Athrun and Meyrin-chan broke up? Since when?"

"Three months ago." Kira replied. He heaved a sigh as he turned his head to meet her gaze. "But he just told me yesterday."

The pink-haired songstress lifted her torso off of bed, looking concerned. She shifted closer towards him under the green satin sheet, putting her chin on his bare chest while keeping their eye contact. Her voice dropped to almost a whisper when she carefully asked, "Is he… is he going back to Cagalli-san?"

Kira shook his head. "I don't think so."

"I see. That's unfortunate."

"Athrun told me that things didn't—and wouldn't—work out fine between them." Kira added, "And he didn't tell me the reason of breaking up with Meyrin."

Silence followed after as Lacus processed this information in her brain. She took a deep breath before forcing herself to get up.

"Come on, we need to get ready for work," she said to the handsome brunette as she left their bed, putting on the nearest clothes she could find—Kira's white shirt—to cover her nakedness. "It's Monday after all. Yzak will be here to pick me up at nine, sharp. I'll talk to Athrun if I see him. Your pants, Commander Yamato."

Groaning, Kira caught the ball of clothes thrown at him. He knew that tone. It was one that Lacus always used when she talked to people as the Chairwoman Clyne. No one could debate her. Even him, Kira Yamato, the hero of the two previous wars and her lover, wasn't an exception.

He stole a glance at Lacus—who was busy drawing back the curtain—, a small smile formed across his features when sunlight hit the engagement ring on her delicate finger and made it shine.

* * *

SHE had always been hoping he would come to love her, someday.

After all the wounds caused by the war were healed.

After all the pain were gone away.

Time heals, people said, but what he suffered was not ordinary thing. That was why she stayed by his side. To let him know he wasn't going through everything alone. Back then, when the first war ended, she had never expected him to come back alive, being carried to Archangel by Athrun and Cagalli, the ring she gave dangling out of his pilot suit. It was still fresh in her mind, the first word he told her.

"I'm back."

It might be short, but it meant he remembered their promise.

She also never expected what happened later when he asked her if it was alright for him to stay in Reverent Malchio's orphanage—a place she often visited whenever it could slip into her tight schedule.

And after the second war came to a halt, he asked her if she could move in to his place—a medium-sized house he just bought—and gave the ring. Her engagement ring. Well, not quite the official engagement, but _sort of_.

But she knew he didn't love her _that_ way. Not yet. The only thing she could tell without a doubt was that he truly cared for her as much as she did for him. He wanted to be close to her as much as she did. So, she agreed to live with him. Just the two of them.

They shared pain.

They shared happiness.

They even shared bed, every night.

Now that they had been living together for almost five years, they also shared hugs—thousands of it—, kisses, and sometimes… more than kisses. But never once she asked him about his feelings. What he thought of her. She didn't have enough courage to find out.

Or perhaps Lacus Clyne was simply scared to hear whatever answer Kira Yamato would give her.

* * *

"KIRA? Welcome back." He heard Lacus greet back, answering his "I'm home" in a bright tone but she was nowhere near his sight. He walked past the dim living room and looked into their chamber and family room but couldn't find her. All the Haros were switched off and placed neatly on a big pillow in front of the TV. Where the hell was she?

A sighed of relief left his lips the moment he caught a glimpse of something pinkish—presumably her hair—in the kitchen. Kira walked in and found Lacus with her frilly, white apron, hair tied back in a high ponytail, busy cooking dinner. She was looked rather tired, but her blue orbs were gleaming with happiness. Noticing his presence, she turned her head and spoke, sweet as ever.

"Why don't you go change first? Dinner will be ready in a minute."

"What do we have?" He asked her, out of curiosity.

"Pasta." She replied simply. Her focus was still at the frying pan as she made the sauce. "It's only a simple dish, because I don't have so much time to prepare today. Ah, but I managed to make fruit sherbet for dessert—it's now cooling in the freezer…"

A smile appeared on his lips. "Lacus."

"You like shrimp, do you? Mrs. Joule sent some for us today, I'm sure it'll go nice with the pasta."

"Lacus."

Finally, the songstress looked at him again. "Yes?"

He landed a kiss upon her forehead.

Silence followed after.

Lacus stood still, stunned.

That, what just happened earlier, was definitely unexpected.

Kira had a boyish grin across his handsome features, looking pleased. He then tucked a strand of hair which went astray behind her ear and whispered, "Thank you."

"You're welcome." She moved away from him to fetch some spices from the cabinet. "Now allow me to ask you to step out from that uniform, Kira. In truth, it'll be even better if you take a quick shower. I really hate to say this, but you do smell. Gods, where have you been?"

"I did several simulations with Shinn today," admitted the Ultimate Coordinator. "We got a little hyped up, I guess."

Lacus smiled. "How is he doing?"

"Fine. He did mention something about Luna nagging Meyrin for the couple of last weeks, though. She wants to know why Athrun doesn't come to visit them as regularly as before. I think Meyrin hasn't told her sister and Shinn about the break-up, yet."

That reminded Lacus of the issue.

"Too bad I didn't meet Athrun today." She sighed. "I'll give him a call tomorrow. How does an invitation for lunch this weekend sound? It's been quite a long time since the last time we do something together, right?"

"Just us?"

Lacus nodded. "Three of us. It's impossible to invite Shinn without Luna, who'd likely persuade us to allow Meyrin-chan coming along. We can't have that. The atmosphere would be bad. Frankly speaking, I want to invite Cagalli-san, too, but she's at the earth right now. There's no way she can come."

Kira let out a masculine chuckle. "You don't want Meyrin to come, but intent on inviting my sister?"

"Cagalli-san knows what she's doing, Kira."

"And Meyrin doesn't?"

Lacus pivoted on her heels, looking up at the brunette whose a brow was raised and walking towards him in determined steps. "I'm saying that they're different type of person. That's all. Now, please get out of the kitchen before your aroma gets into my cooking. I might smell like food and spices all over my body, but you smell like sweat, Kira. And both of us know which one is better than the other."

With that, she managed to make him go.

* * *

DINNER was great. It—the greatness, _not_ the dinner—was a usual thing, actually. As they ate, Kira and Lacus talked about their day at work, discussed several issues and gave their partner a piece of their mind. Sometimes the conversation turned serious, but some other times Lacus' free giggles echoed through the wall.

He enjoyed their togetherness.

It was comfortable to be close to her.

Unlike his first love interest—yes, that redhead named Fllay Allster—, Lacus never once said "I'm here for you" or anything similar to him. She promised him nothing. She was just being there all along, accompanying him without even asking for a reward.

During hard times.

And happy times.

She never left. She was warm, understanding, patient and sweet. She was the most unselfish person he'd ever known.

If he was going to be honest with himself, she was the best thing that ever occurred in his life.

Kira was ripped out of his reverie when he heard Lacus' faint shriek. Raising his head, he found her dress skirt was tainted with dark blotches. Coffee. For whatever reason, she had lost balance and—probably—stumbled upon a table's leg, causing the jug of hot coffee she was carrying to fall. He stood up right away.

"You must be tired." Kira picked up the fallen jug. Half of its content was spilled onto the floor, but the small mess could be fixed. It was her he should more worry about. Lacus Clyne, no matter how hard she tried, was still a woman. A human with limit. She wasn't the Ultimate Coordinator, unlike him. "I'll handle this. You go change and rest."

She contemplated it for awhile.

Then, "Alright. I'll just wash this dress first, or the stain will never come off."

He followed her to the bathroom. "Lacus."

"I'll wash my dress as I bathe, okay? Hot water helps me relax, anyway."

She forced a smile even though she knew he could read her like an open book. Kira sighed heavily. "Just... throw that dress away. I'll buy you thousands more, each in different color. No washing."

"Don't spoil me, Kira. It's not necessary." Smiling faintly, she reached for the shower and turned it on. Her hands slid down her front, undoing the criss-cross lace ribbon along her torso to get out of the dress. "And honestly, I'd really appreciate it if you stop worrying too much. You're not helping."

By the next second Lacus Clyne realized her mistake.

"_Help?_" Kira drawled, his voice suddenly lowering until she almost missed the word. It was more like a purr, floating into the air, brushing against her skin. He was standing behind her so closely—_too_ closely—and nuzzling the top of her head, sending a shiver along her spine. "Is that it? You want _my help?_"

Lacus swiftly turned around to clarify what she had said earlier, when he used his inhuman speed to tear her delicately-made silk dress. The ruined garment slipped off her hips easily and lay in a heap on the wet tiles. She was left only in her panties before she could tell what was going on.

Gods. _Oh, gods!_

"Kira!" Lacus snapped at him, those rosy peaks of her breast puckered instantly as they met the coolness of open air and the warmth of water. That sensation alone brought a giddiness to her; she stepped back and almost tripped over her damaged clothes, had it not been for the brunette who caught and steadied her. She gasped loudly the moment he nibbled the ridge of her ear and bit down with a low, amused chuckle. A shiver crept along her spine. "What are you doing? Kira!"

He had never acted like this.

Every personal (and intimate) thing that ever happened between them mostly started with a tentative kiss or a small peck which grew passionate in each second. There was also several times when he got a little rough, yet this still felt different. Here, under the shower spraying lukewarm water upon them, she realized for the first time how powerful and dangerous Kira Yamato was.

"Easy, Songstress." The tip of his wet tongue darted out, tasting her wet temple. He put an arm around her shoulders, pressing her soft body to his hard one, as his other hand slithered downwards. Next, Lacus felt a kind sting against her hips—Kira had snapped her last piece of clothing into a small ball of rag, baring her to him completely. She bit her lip, looking up in anxiety. "I'm helping you," he breathed, his head descended only to land on her pulse point and suckled gently.

Lacus whimpered in the back of her throat. Her knees wavered and she unconsciously leaned to his strong hold. Kira smiled against her feverish skin as he pressed his mouth hotly along her jaw line. Purposefully, he shifted their position a little, rubbing every inch of their torsos together. He could see her beautiful face contorted while he did so, the friction from her hardened nipples dragged on his wet cotton shirt must be killing her. A male satisfaction flooded through his veins.

He repeated the action.

This time, Lacus couldn't take it anymore. Her lips parted open, releasing a strangled moan while her small hands grabbing his forearms in a death grip.

"Ohh…"

"See?" Kira hummed in enjoyment. "I thought you would like that."

Lacus opened her mouth once again to argue but out of the blue his slightly calloused hand met the exposed skin of her heavy globes, stealing any words and coherent thoughts out of her brain. When he trapped one peak between his thumb and forefinger the air was sucked out of her lungs and all she could emit was harsh gasps. She had both eyes shut close, losing herself in the sensation. Kira, meanwhile, peppered her face and neck with butterfly kisses as his clever fingers continued the sweet torture.

"Gods, Kira." Lacus panted, "W-w-wait. Stop…!"

He let out a dark chuckle. "Do you _really_ want me to stop?"

Her eyes snapped open when she felt him no longer holding her, instead letting the wall support her shaky body. Those clear sapphire orbs widened in awe when he took a narrow step back, stripped off his shirt and bared the thick muscles of his hard chest, which rippled deliciously as they now met directly with warm water. He eyed her down, causing Lacus to press her back even further against the tiled wall, then moved to turn the shower off, reach the bottle of her bodywash and a shower puff before turning to her again.

A flicker of predatory gleam was spotted in his eyes.

It sucked all strings of thought out of her brain.

Her body was hot all over.

Each centimeter of her skin ached for him, despite of what she had spoken a minute ago.

Kira reached out for Lacus, pulling her to his side, then having the ZAFT's Chairwoman stand without his support after balancing her stunned form. Keeping their eye contact, he smoothed the soapy puff down her back, to her round arse—

—the column of her throat—

—the graceful fall of her shoulders and arms—

—and her perky breasts, leaving dripping suds in the process as he gently rubbed her flesh clean.

With a great reluctance, Kira finally cut their eye-lock and fell onto his knees, working the soap along her legs. First, he dragged the shower puff from her thighs down to her ankles, her toes, and last, he let the puff abandoned on the floor; his large hands continued the task. Kira massaged her calf muscles methodically, feeling them relax under his touch. Slow but sure, he went higher and higher until he was kneading her inner thigh.

Lacus was shaking.

She had a vague idea about where his destination. Nonetheless, she couldn't arrange a sensible sentence right now. She had no choice but watched as one hand crawled higher, prying her folds open…

"AH!"

Lacus was facing the hardest time holding herself up. The feeling of his fingers slid inside her moist heat pitched her part-way forward. She grabbed the first thing she could reach to hang on—his shoulders—, fingernails digging his hard body mercilessly. Lacus was almost sure the marks would remain reddish for a few hours, but she thought he deserves it. Why not? Kira Yamato was purring in satisfaction against her stomach, his male pride was definitely inflated. A little sting wouldn't hurt.

"Marry me, Lacus." Kira blurted out without bother about nice, pretty proposing words. He stood up again to switch the shower on. "Stay with me for the rest of my life. Or until you get sick seeing my face."

The pink-haired girl was perplexed. This was completely unarranged and unexpected. Getting proposed in the bathroom was something she had never imagined. Not that she hated it, though, but…

"K-Kira, I-I'm—"

Eyeing her still trembling body, Kira smiled in understanding. "You don't have to give me the answer right away. For now… let's just get you clean. A clean body leads to a good sleep."

Lacus could only give a weak nod.

She was about to say yes anyway.

* * *

LIKE their usual weekends, Kira forced Lacus to spend extra time cuddling on their comfortable bed. It always felt good, being lazy after five tiring days in a row every week. Sighing in contentment, he pressed his front to her back; his arm tightened its grip around her narrow waist. He liked the scent of her hair: fresh, reminded him of a newly-picked flowers. She never smelled bad, actually. He had been wondering for long how she could manage to do such thing and hadn't discovered the answer.

"What time is it?" Lacus asked with a small yawn.

"Forget it." Kira nuzzled her locks affectionately. "Go back to sleep."

She gave an amused giggle. "Kira..."

"Don't. Please."

"Commander Yamato."

_Shit_. A warning tone. ZAFT should release some new regulations about prohibition of using authorities outside duty. He pulled away slightly from her to glance at the clock hanging some feet above the headboard. "Alright, alright. I got it. It's now nine-thirty."

The girl wiggled out of his embrace. "Oh, no. Athrun will be here in no time."

"It's weekend."

"And we have a guest coming over." Lacus finally managed to pry herself from under the duvet and his hold. She sat on the bed, staring at the handsome man lay beside her, whose bangs fell gracefully on his face. Pursing a smile, she cleared her throat to catch his attention. "Let's make a deal. Tell me, what should I do to make you wake up? We've already skipped breakfast, Kira, we can't be any lazier. Not when Athrun's coming here."

The brunette had his eyes cracked open. The idea of having a deal sounded interesting. "One kiss," he said.

"Yes?"

"One kiss and I'll be good."

Lacus heaved a sigh. From past experiences, usually a kiss would turn out to be something more. But this time she wouldn't let him take over. Without dilly-dallying she leaned down, brushed her lips sweetly against him and quickly leaped off of their bed before Kira got the chance to blink.

"That's cruel." Kira protested.

She flashed him a sly smile. "You _did_ say one kiss. The duration is up to me. Come on, Kira, we only have so little time before Athrun arrives. He's punctual."

The doorbell rang when they were almost done with the prep.

"Let me," said Kira, volunteering to answer the door. Lacus nodded; she switched on some Haros to create more noise, bringing up a liveliness. Those robots would love to play with Tori and Okapi in the backyard as Kira, Athrun and she ate under the open sky. They were going to have a picnic-styled lunch today.

"Sorry for intruding."

Lacus pivoted around and found Athrun Zala stood side by side with Kira. Her face lightened in pure joy at the sight of him and the Haros jumped enthusiastically as if they recognized their creator. Even Tori gave a loud squeal and flew towards him, who raised a hand for it to land. "Long time no see, Lacus."

"True. It's been quite awhile." She waved her hand, signaling the two young men to come forward. "Come and sit here. Such a nice weather today, isn't it?"

"Yeah. …And, wow, a picnic?"

"My idea, actually. What do you think?"

"Lovely."

The girl smiled coyly. "Well, I and Kira agreed that sometimes we need to loosen up a bit."

"Indeed."

Athrun returned the smile, stepping out of his shoes and sitting on the spread blanket. Kira followed after him. They sat together in a perfect triangle shape, surrounding a big basket full of food containers and a bucket filled with ice cubes, chilling two bottles of lemonade inside. Lacus took out three medium-sized glasses, wiped it clean, and poured some into each before distributing them.

The day passed nicely.

* * *

LACUS eventually had some time alone with Athrun—thanks to Kira, who excused himself from them, saying he would go play with Haros and Okapi so that those noisy mechanical toys (if they could be called that) wouldn't disturb her clean up the dishes.

"Umm, Athrun?" She asked tentatively, meanwhile her hands continued soaping dirty containers. "May I ask you something?"

"Of course," replied Athrun.

She turned the faucet to cleanse her hands and turned around. Athrun was wiping the apples he brought with him and placing them into a big fruit basket on the dining table. She closed the distance between them, purposefully standing nearby so that she caught his attention. "I heard you broke up with Meyrin-chan, is it true?"

Athrun tensed a little. Then, "Yeah. We did."

Sitting on a dining chair across him, Lacus seemed thoughtful for a moment. "Why?"

Lord, does he have to answer that?

"It's just… things didn't work well between us."

Athrun said it with a grimace. His chest clenched uncomfortably in every answer he gave her. He had a prediction that the woman in front of him would want to know more; since the first time they knew each other, she always had a way to make anybody tell her anything she wants to know—even the unspeakable stuff. Apparently he was right, because Lacus opened her lips and spoke, "Do you still love Cagalli-san?"

Oh, he had expected that to come out.

"No."

"But you _loved_ her, right?" Lacus was persistent. "Perhaps… deep down, you still hope that Cagalli-san—"

She got no chance to finish; Athrun had cut her off immediately.

"I was under the misapprehension that I loved her."

A dumbstruck Lacus stared at him, speechless. It took her several seconds to recover from her perplexity and for her brain to process the meaning from what she had heard, Those sapphire eyes had a hint of worry, if anyone bothered to take a small observation, but she quickly played out her calm demeanor.

"You aren't serious saying it…, are you?"

It came almost in a whisper.

Athrun smiled wryly. "Unfortunately, yes. You heard it right, Lacus. It was… it was a mistake from the start, me and Cagalli. I forced myself into thinking that I loved her, just because I care for her like the way she cares for Kira. And eventually we realized that our relationship—yeah, you already know the story. Yet I found myself repeating the very same mistake with Meyrin. I'm such a jerk."

Good Lord.

That was out of calculation. When Lacus determined herself to ask Athrun a little about his breaking up with the younger Hawke, never once she thought of hearing a quite-shocking confession like this. How could she guess? Athrun and Cagalli were so lovey-dovey; she even accidentally bumped into them kissing two or three times, and this was the truth behind it?

Ridiculous.

"Why, Athrun?" Carefully, Lacus asked further. "What makes you did… things like that?"

He looked as though he was suffering. The ZAFT's Head Engineer breathed a few times, in and out, in and out, before giving his answer oh-so reluctantly, his gaze dropped as it avoided hers. "…To distract myself. I needed to get someone out of my head… very bad. Nonetheless, now I realize that all my attempts went futile. That person still haunts me. She won't leave my head no matter how hard I tried to forget her."

He ended it with a bitter laugh.

Concern filled Lacus' beautiful features. She gave Athrun her soft look, plucking a single flower from the small vase on the table and inhaling the faint smell with absolute grace in every move. "It's a woman?" A smile formed across her lips. "She must be so important for you, then. But I don't understand, Athrun. Why do you have to forget her? What happened?"

Athrun ignored the question. Instead, he asked her back, lifting his eyes inch by inch until their gazes met again. "Do you want to know who she is?"

Silence.

Seemed unsure—and quite taken aback—, Lacus contemplated for a few minutes. She took notice of Athrun's hard expression and made her decision. She spoke sweetly, "Will you tell?"

His eyes bore deep into hers.

"It's you, Lacus."

**.**

**end.**


End file.
